Ramblings and Readings on Perfectionism

Perfectionism can be a ball-and-chain. In some very few people, a healthy dose of perfectionism will work well with their other traits and be somewhat of a blessing, rather than a curse. My mom is a perfectionist, but she also has many other wonderful qualities which include an amazing work-ethic, crazy perseverance, an unwillingness to give up, and the ability to say, "this is as good as it gets" and walk away from something that she knows she has done a darn good job on. Her opposing qualities over-rule her perfectionism and let her use it to her advantage. I, on the other hand, have perfectionism paired with some nasty friends. I am a procrastinator. My mom can procrastinate too, but usually it is when she has already completed hours or days of productive activity. Sometimes, when I haven't bothered to think about lists, or priorities, or the steps in a task, and even though I may have mountains of things that should be done, can you guess what you will find me doing? First, I will probably wander around the house aimlessly for a bit, maybe putting a random cup in the dishwasher and then possibly eat some of whatever happens to be on the counter (like potato chips- ack!), and then maybe I will sit down at my computer and spend an hour on Facebook. Yes, I can be an extremely productive person when there is lots to do. Insert an eye-roll and a nervous giggle and grin here. I have loads of avoidance techniques. Unfortunately, I also live in a household full of perfectionist/procrastinators, so it's pretty easy just to fall in line with the rest. I have a pretty good work-ethic, not quite as intense as my mom's, but I have never had any problem working all day without breaks for weeks, if I finally get into the groove or if I am working for someone else.

I want things to be so perfect that sometimes I can't even start. There are so many ideas and grand plans going on in my head all of the time, but the problem is, for the most-part, that is where they stay (maybe there wouldn't be so many if I could just cross some of them off the list). When I first started this blog and my other one, my business had not quite overtaken me yet. I was able to get in a reasonable amount of posts in the first year. I never really found a voice on this one, but at least there were posts. One of things I wanted to do when I finally sold my business was to blog and maybe even vlog. Even though things were very crazy for a few months after selling my business, when they calmed down and I had the possibility of time to devote to other things, did I post on my blogs? Nope. What I did do was talk a lot, to others and in my head, about how I was going to start blogging again. There was definitely a weariness and a lack of motivation involved, but I would say for the most part, it was my perfectionism getting in the way. I should learn to code. In fact, I should learn all of the languages of coding, as opposed to my very basic knowledge of an outdated form of html. Oooh, if I were an expert coder, then I could build myself an excellent, superior, creative blog, and I could do that for others too, and maybe I could develop apps, and maybe I could do all sorts of other computer related things and maybe I should learn everything. I should learn more about photography so I have great pictures for my blog. I should learn how to take that fancy camera of mine off of automatic and learn to shoot raw, and I should take a photography course, or read lots of books on how to learn everything about cameras and photography and maybe I should learn everything. Ooooh, if I did all that, then maybe I could even shoot people's weddings, and portraits, and oh, those wonderful baby shoots with the little crocheted hats and burlap and Gerbera daisies and what-not. Oh, oh, and then I could submit photos to stock photo sites, and create photos as art, and learn and create all sorts of new things to do with cameras. I could probably give a dozen examples of things I wanted to learn to perfection before I should start blogging again. Thankfully it only took me a year and a half to quell the need to do 100 things to perfection and then learn everything before I could even start (can I possibly insert another major eye-roll here), and finally just made the jump. This is something I literally had to talk myself through. I had to get to that breaking point where I was so ashamed and frustrated with myself for not doing things that it was ok to just start something, and remind myself that I can go back and make things better later...or not.

Here's the thing; this blog is named Adventures of an Autodidact. What is an autodidact? A self-learner. To some degree we are all self learners because we all learn some things by ourselves, especially when we learn from our mistakes. A perfectionist is so afraid of making mistakes that it often prevents them from trying (or starting) things. If I can't make mistakes, not only am I not learning, and limiting myself in my pursuit of being an autodidact, but I am also limiting myself in life. Do I want either of those things? Absolutely and passionately not! I read somewhere that sometimes, just writing down some of the ways perfectionism hinders you in different areas of your life will help you see the ridiculousness of it and be able to let it go. Perfectionism is holding me back and I will do my best to beat it down. Writing this post is my first step.

Readings on Perfectionism

Here is the post from The Art of Simple that started my little foray into perfectionist ramblings. I can relate to every one of her examples. The craft cupboard (or closet, or drawer, or dresser) that needs re-organizing? Check. Not working out at all because you don't have time for a super intense, perfect work-out(when I couldn't even handle that workout because it has been so long)? Check. I could go on, but it might get depressing.

Why Perfectionists Should Strive to be Exceptionalists - this article is kind of like a punch in the gut, but it is a good dose of truth about perfectionism and some thoughts on how to break the cycle.

My Summer Reading List
For most of my life, I have been a list maker. I loved making lists. I loved checking things off. Almost 2 years ago, I sold a business in which I was far too busy for far too long. It took a toll on me. When I sold the business, I stopped making lists, and for the most part, I also stopped accomplishing much of anything. So, in the spirit of trying to move on and grab a piece of my old life back, I am making a summer reading list- a rather ambitious list with 14 books included- and I worry that I am making it too big or that I am not leaving enough room for spontaneous reading or gems that I come across over the summer, but guess what? This list is not written on a concrete tablet and neither is it a binding contract. It is simply a way for me to remember the books I want to read so I don't forget any of them and for motivation to try to complete a list so that I can jump up and down and say, "yay for me" and "yay for lists".

Fiction (including fluff- don't judge)

1. The Memory Keeper's Daughter by Kim Edwards
2.The Drums of Autumn by Diana Gabaldon
3. City of Lost Souls by Cassandra Clare
This is the fifth book in the City of Bones series. It is teen fiction and I enjoy it. Sue me.
4. City of Heavenly Fire by Cassandra Clare
5. Clockwork Angel by Cassandra Clare
6. Clockwork Prince by Cassandra Clare
7. Clockwork Princess by Cassandra Clare

Non-fiction

1. 1000 Gifts: A Dare to Live Fully Right Where You Are by Ann Voskamp
I find Ann's blog and pretty much anything she does incredibly inspiring and also envy inducing because she just knows her way around words, feelings, and thoughts like nobody's business.
2. The Life-changing Magic of Tidying Up: The Japanese Art of De-cluttering and Organizing by Marie Kondo
I saw this book mentioned on a blog. I think it was Apartment Therapy. I put it on hold at my local library and I am something like 200th in line for it. With a wait like that, I'm hoping it's a miracle maker.
3. Notes from a Blue Bike: The Art of Living Intentionally in a Chaotic World by Tsh Oxenreider
Tsh is a blogger at The Art of Simple.
4. Hold onto Your Kids: Why Parents Need to Matter More than Peers by Gordon Neufeld
So many people have been recommending this book for so long that, even though my youngest is 14 now, I feel like I have to read it or there will be some profound piece missing from my life.

Books I am reading aloud to my 14 year old

1. Little Women by Louisa May Alcott
I never read this book as a child. My oldest read it and loved it. We started reading this aloud with another girl that I invited over to join our homeschooling one day a week, but she hasn't been able to come for awhile so we will be continuing on our own.
2. The Swiss Family Robinson by Johann David Wyss
I never read this book either, but I love, love, loved the little tv series that used to be on when I was younger. I even named one of my dolls Samantha after the doll of the little girl on the show. I am hoping the book will be as good as the show and plan to watch the show again after as well.

Recipe Books

1. Oh She Glows by Angela Liddon
Essentially I have already "read" this book. Putting it on this list means that I want to make as many recipes as possible from the book and experience the book. This is one where I discovered the book first, which then led me to her blog instead of the other way around.

Read ALL the blogs!

I used to enjoy Garfield and Archie as a kid. As an adult, I am not a big reader of comics. About once every year or two, when I pick up a paper I will read the comics, but I don't really get much out of it. I haven't really seen much in graphic novels or the like. I am definitely a visual person, but in the case of comics, it seems to go to slow for me, and I get bored. Well, I'm here to tell ya that I found some "comics" that I love, and they are found on two blogs. My oldest daughter and I spent some time over the weekend looking at these blogs and I would love to share my favourite entries with you.


Disclaimer: One thing I don't enjoy about these blogs is that they have some profanity. The blogs are funny enough that I am willing to suffer through it for the laugh, but sadly, the profanity sometimes ruins the joke (for me anyway), because I am too busy making a face, like the one you have when you eat a lemon, to remember what I was reading about.


Blog: Hyperbole and a Half


post: dog


post: The Party


post: The A lot is Better Than you at Everything


Blog: Parenting. Illustrated with Crappy Pictures


I think you will get the most out of this blog if you have kids, but if you don't have any, it will still be amusing (my 17 year old daughter loves it).


post: I did these things as a kid (but my kids won't)


post: While mama was in the bathroom - episode 1
I love it when people are brutally honest about things that people never talk about. I guess that pretty much sums up why this blog is funny. She is not afraid to talk about ANYTHING!


post: public toilets vs. newly potty trained girls and boys


Enjoy! Remember laughter is the best medicine (says the girl who is just getting over her first cold in almost 2 years and spent good time in the last four days reading these blogs to get the biggest dose of "medicine" possible).

New Uses for Plastic Easter Eggs

I came across an interesting blog today and thought I would share this beautiful, crafty post for turning plastic easter eggs into oh so wonderful and softly beautiful "robin's eggs". I know I have some of those lying around here and I am sure I haven't used them for years. I am on an any shade of turquoise kick and have been for a while. It is just one of those colors that makes you feel good.

I also noticed that there was a comment below the robin's egg entry from someone who re-used the eggs by filling them with homemade silly putty and gifting them. If you are not into the robin's eggs, that would be another great way to get an extra mile out of them.

Bargain Decorating Finds

I subscribe to Style at Home magazine. It is a Canadian magazine, which is nice for me, as many times when reading U.S. magazines, us Canadians find that we are not allowed to enter the contests, products listed are not shipped to Canada and not available in Canadian stores. Even if you don't subscribe, there is lots of great stuff to discover on their website. I also subscribe to their newsletter, which brings me interesting tidbits right to my inbox.


I received a newsletter this morning with the subject line being "Budget Friendly Living Spaces". They sure know how to entice this gal. The 20 living room accessories under $20 article jumped right out at me first. There are some great low cost items listed to either almost outfit a whole room or for a little bit of extra pop. The item that had me drooling a little was the aquamarine candlesticks! Some of the items (including the heavenly candlesticks) could probably be created at home for even more budget stretching ability. For instance, the making the sheer curtains would only take a beginner level sewing ability, and the candlesticks would only require a successful goodwill trip and some spray paint. Throw pillows are a pretty simple one too.

Ahhhh, Nostalgia. Anyone remember these guys?

Once upon a time, I loved the martians from Sesame Street...well, maybe I still love the martians, and that is why I want to share them with you. My girls and I just watched some of their videos on youtube. I also love youtube. There are so many things from my childhood that I can just pull up anytime I want to and share with my children.


There are many more Sesame Street alien videos on youtube. Even though the two below, aren't the ones with the most views, these are my personal favorites.

More Videos About the Pacific Garbage Patch

I am posting again about the pacific garbage patch because since my first post I have actually seen some visual evidence of it myself. Our family recently took a vacation to Hawaii. I have been there many times before as a child, but this was my first time as an adult. The beaches were all fine on the two islands we were at, that is, until we took a drive to a fairly deserted residential stretch of beach that it looked like not too many tourists ventured upon. You know how stones get smoothed out by water? Of course, the same thing happens to plastic. This beach was filled with nice little smooth flat stones, but these stones were not made of rock, they were colorful bits of plastic with nicely rounded edges. It was sad and disheartening. I started to try and gather bits to take back with me to a garbage can (and where would that end up going after anyway), but quickly realized the magnitude of the amount of plastic present on this very large beach and how little difference I was making. One of the videos says that the only real way we can make a difference is to reduce consumption. I am willing to give a very genuine effort towards that. Will you join me?


The following video has a lot of the same images as the one I posted in this post, but this one is set to music instead of being a news story, so for me anyway, it gives a little bit more of a haunting, dire feeling. There is also a very horrific image of a dead turtle in this one, that I think is more disgusting, and therefore more motivating (to get rid of plastic) than any other image I have seen so far. Just imagine for a minute what that turtle had to endure before it was finally given the peace of death.





The following video is basically an expansion of the information presented by Good Morning America.